Pregnancy: A Conversation No-No

As I sit here on my couch waiting for my husband to get home, I flipped to the Dr.Phil show on the OWN Network.  It caught my eye because it was about women who are obsessed about getting pregnant. Now when I say obsessed, I mean that is all they talk about and have ruined their marriages because of it.  I now consider pregnancy a touching subject.  A subject that most women would put up there with money, religion, and politics.  Now I am writing this from my point of view but I also see the other side of this issue.

When my husband and I quit trying not to have a baby, I just thought it would happen fast.  I knew that it takes time and you have to do it on certain days and do certain things.  We didn’t do that.  We always said it will happen when it happens.  Then our friends, one by one, starting announcing they were pregnant.  All six of them.  Then it was game on.  It all of a sudden change my feeling towards having a baby.  I want one now.

I guess we should have planned a little better than we did.  We had a trip for Mexico planned in April and we were so excited.  So here comes March 29, 2010 and one of the classic symptoms of pregnancy shows up and I knew right then.  A women knows her body and can just tell when something is different.  After I got home from work that evening I dragged my husband up to our neighborhood bar for one last night of happy hour.  I know that is the smartest thing I have done but it is fine and I “officially” didn’t know anything.  After many beers we came home and my husband couldn’t wait to find out so he runs up to the local Walgreen’s and buys three pregnancy tests.  I try to tell him that you have to take the tests first thing in the morning and the fact that I had some beers that night that the test was not going to work.  Well, all three were positive.  Really?

So we had no problems with getting pregnant, our timing was a little off, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.  I now realize that many couples sometimes have a really hard time trying to conceive.  Or even if they conceive there is a possibility of miscarriage.  I couldn’t even imagine going through something like that.  So before I would ask friends or family, “when are you guys going to have children?”  Now I keep my mouth shut and will congratulate them when it is announced or talk about it when they want to.  Can you imagine trying for years and people coming up to you asking about your plans to have children.  I would scream, “I’m f*%!ing trying, back off!”  I don’t know what I would do if I had to keep trying for years for a child.  It just breaks my heart to think about it.

I never really understood the hardship of trying to conceive or the hardship of carrying a child to term.  I will hug and kiss my daughter everyday because she is a miracle and I know that.  Many people are not as lucky as we are and I am truly grateful everyday for what I have.  We may not have a big mansion, fancy cars, or expensive jewelry but we have our family and that is all I need.

My Love

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